The Realities of Institutionalization

It is one thing to read about a subject. But living it, is a whole different ballgame.

I am so thankful for the wonderful work of professionals and available resources for adoptive families on how to parent children from "hard places".

To be honest, my biggest concern prior to bringing home the boys was dealing with Luke's hearing loss and how we would communicate with him. The reality? That hasn't been much of an issue at all. Of course it is a concern of ours, but it is easier to deal with at this stage than other issues. As Rachael so aptly said the night we got home from the airport, "Adoption isn't just puppies and kittens. Bears and snakes are there, too." There is so much truth to that statement.

We met the boys one month ago today. I have been reminded again over the last two days how important it is to emphasize that children belong in FAMILIES, not institutions. Our boys received wonderful care and for that we are forever grateful. As those of you adoptive families know, we are starting at the beginning. The very beginning. The cycle of need must be met over and over again. Those synapses and connections are just not there. You see a handsome boy who is almost 4 year old. We see an infant who wants to be held all the time and loved on because he never had that one-on-one care provided by parents.

My patience sometimes wears thin. I must think first, empathasize, then react. It is exhausting at times, especially when both little guys need so much individual attention. It is so different than the "typical" parenting of our biological children.

But is it worth it? Yes. Have we already seen forward progress? Yes. Here are just a few:

*Luke and Jansen's eye contact is getting better.

*Both boys are giving us kisses and hugs.

*We have lots more laughter in our house.

*Swimming, bathtime, and rides in the van are some favorite activities.

*Meal times and bedtimes usually go well


James 1:17
Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.

Jo Anna